Wednesday, January 14, 2004

Our doula is coming over to our house in a few hours for our 2nd prenatal visit and to go over birth plan stuff. I tidied up a bit but feel hot and crampy so when she called I told her to expect a disaster area. There's still baby shower stuff all over the living room. At least I'm done with the thank you cards from that.

She laughed and said she's got 3 kids and has Christmas toys all over her living room and not to worry about it.

I'm not worrying about it... Paul is worrying about it. He's soooo nesty it's making me nuts. Every time I look at him he's worrying about cleaning something else. Last night in the shower he told me he's finally starting to relax and look forward to the idea of doing things with the baby. Before imagining the baby actually being here would send him into a panic. Maybe that's why he's been obsessed with cleaning things? Channeling panic into something productive? Or feeling the need to be in control of SOMETHING when there's this other thing that's coming he can't much control.

I don't feel nesty at all. What I DO feel is mega-horny. I dream erotic dreams that only make me feel lustier than I already do. And the trouble with 3rd trimester sex is that it's got to be very gentle, very deliberate and very easy. But what I crave is crazy, demonic, wild, jungle sex instead.

Pregnancy hormones. Whee!

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