"This is day number 243 and you're 35 weeks pregnant!
You have 37 days or 5 weeks left, and are 86% of the way there. Baby's age since conception is 229 days or 33 weeks. You are due on 2/5/2004."
Nnnnrrrrrgh. 5 more weeks?! Nnnnnnrrrrgh. And today baby decides to be super wiggly and bouncy after a day or two of being reasonable. Of course.