Today was our 1st OB appt. and we met Dr. G. and we both decided we liked him. He's very direct and a little gruff, but seemed nice and I felt he handled me ok during the pelvic exam. Everything looked normal, including my cervix so I really don't know waht the ER doc thought she saw when she checked me out a few weeks back. A nabothian cyst maybe. Whatever. Dr. G. said my cervix looked just like a pregnant cervix and was fine. They'll call back on the labs when they come in and like Dr. H., they want to monitor me for hypothyroid med changes and gestational diabetes developing. He said he usually expects a gain of 25-30 lbs but he doesn't mind my gaining a bit less and I got the ok for exercise. Yay!

Paul was mostly well behaved and kept the Rosemary's Baby comments to a minimum. Although at the last moment after I'd changed to a paper gown and I was up on the exam table and the doctor knocked on the door to see if it was ok to come in, he whispered from the wicker chair in the corner of the room, "Hey! Sniff him and see if he smells like tannis root!" Of course, when the doc went by and I got a whiff of his cologne, I got the giggle fits.

I kind of threw up at the doc's office so I got a prescription for nausea meds that I'm going to fill later on today. Also came home with oodles of prenatal samples. Geez!

Yesterday Paul and I went out to lunch and got a chance to talk. Then we went home and watched 4 movies in a row. He says he's starting to feel sick and I'm struggling with morning sickness so we're not exactly the most happening people in the world right now. I feel soooo pregnant. Threw up after brushing my teeth -- going to have to try kid's toothpaste to see if that's any better. Nancy tells me I'll get a second wind in second trim but I can't think that far ahead right now. Just getting thorugh one day at a time is a challenge.

Ugh. I feel better now after brushing my teeth and a quickie shower but before I felt gross. Never got to watch any of the movies we rented -- I hit the sack as soon as I got back because I felt so bad. Sea bands back on, groaning and moaning, tossing and turning. I must have dozed but I can't recall it and I def. do not feel rested. I got up to go pee and then ended up racing for the potty to throw up, crying, and who knows what else.

Paul sat there on the edge of the tub watching me yak and rubbed my back in between episodes. 4 more weeks... 4 more weeks... please let it go away after 4 more weeks....

My mom just called. Which normally isn't a bad thing but I was just getting snuggly with Paul and it totally ruined the moment for me. So I talked to mom for a bit and now we're getting ready to snag something for dinner. I think I'm going to suggest subs and renting movies and see if we can't back into snuggle mode. It made me think of all the times in the last 10 years that my mother has interrupted a perfectly good make out moment by calling me up on the telephone. Does she have radar or something?!

Nancy called to congratulate me and to chat for a little while. It was nice to talk to her -- we hadn't gotten a chance to do so since we went to see her in Feb. Jacob has weaned himself at 6 mos. and is now teething so she offered me her breast pump. We gossiped over friends, pregnancy, husbands, and more and it was a nice time. She also said to feel free to call her if I needed anything or any advice. Sometimes I really love my friends.

On another note, I'm anxious for Paul to get home. Come home. Now! Now! I've missed him, and I have things I want to tell him. I also have this urge to smell him... I love his smell.

Canceled movie plans with my sister. I am in the throes of bad nausea and evil boob aches. Ugh. Took a shower but it's not making me feel any better. And the headache is back.

Today I am 8 weeks. I feel mostly good and I have been sleeping REALLY well in the last few days. I guess that is to make up for the rounds of nausea. I had to take a Tylenol for yesterday's headache -- what a doozy! I feel hot though -- but then I've been hot this whole time. My temp hovers at 99 degress. Paul started calling me an incubator the other night.

Visited with Karen yesterday and today we're going to try to catch a movie. She wants to go see Nemo.

Paul's off on a short business trip so I had to drive him to the airport this morning. He took his _Expectant Father_ book to read and while he wasn't looking I slipped a lovey note into it. I miss him already. It feels weird to look out the window and know it's time for him to be getting home from work and he just isn't going to be there today. Sigh.

Nausea is making me nuts today -- twice I've semi-thrown up. The moodiness is hitting me too -- had three mini crying jags just because I was a reading a book and parts of it would set me off. Very melancholy mood. Also worrisome. I'll be 8 weeks later this week, and the more time that passes the less risk of it...but what if I miscarry? What if Paul's plane crashes? What if I don't like the baby? What if something is wrong with the baby? What about a will, guardians, life insurance? What about when I'm ready to go back to work? What about our relationship? Ugh. I hope this moodiness passes soon. I think I even prefer the nausea over this!

Yesterday we went to dim sum with my parents and my sister. I couldn't cope with the idea of having to wear something because all my shorts are starting to fit me strange and my bras def. fit me strange so I resorted to this navy blue button up dress with tiny white polka dots all over it. I got it at a thrift shop years years ago for $3. Paul likes this dress because it unbuttons all down the front. I like this dress because it's not complicated and I resort to wearing it on PMS type days when I need to wear something quasi decent to go out but I feel too bloated to deal with anything too fitted. It occurred to me while I was wearing it that it would do very nicely through at least 2nd trimester -- it's an "A" line and flowy and all that. So maybe it was dress making me look more "mom" somehow. Because Paul must have told me a million times yesterday that he loved me, that I was beautiful and that I was wonderful.

Then again, it could have been my boobs.

Paul's become boob obsessed and we play this game where he tries to get at them and I defend them. He dons the most lecherous expression and tries to feel me up and I scream and beat him away. They've gotten bigger and my nipples are now as wide across as my thumb if you don't count the long fingernails. It's alarming -- and I am going to have to shop for new bras very soon -- we're entering "huge tracts of land" territory here.

Got the first baby related bill today. I owe my OB/GYN $400 for all my prenatal care and delivery. (Insurance will pay the other $2000.) I wonder how much insurance will cover with the rest of the hospital bills and whoever else needs to be paid? I have to look at the ins. book.

I am having the "pins and needles" prickly feelings behind my pubic bone again. Uterus must be doing some stretching or something. Very annoying. I want to scratch it and I can't!

We are back from the family doc's. I had to go in for a progress check on my UTI -- so another pee sample and they will call me back later today to tell me if I need more antibiotic. Oh, and the nurse from the OB? She did call back and guess who has more bedrest until NEXT Wed.? Nnnnrgh!

Paul was going for his annual physical and he's trying to unwind now and calm down because going to the doctor always gets him anxious.

Paul told me Dr. B. wanted to know if anythign was wrong with him. Paul told him nothing was wrong with him. So then Dr. B. wanted to know why he made the appointment. Paul tells him he didn't make the appointment, his wife (me) made the appointment. So then Dr. B. wanted to know if *I* think there is something the matter with him. So then Paul explains that I make him have a check-up once a year. I have no records for him since his mother's house burnt up so I make him go so we can build a medical history for him. I suppose Dr. B. thought it odd since most people are reactive rather than preventative in regards to check-ups.

Paul has to have another appt to scan his heart murmur and see how that is, he has to try to improve his HDL/LDL ratio, his blood pressure is high normal so he has to try to keep it there or improve it, he has to cut down on his smoking and soda habits. His hernia scar/area looks fine and other than breaking the scale's height measuring rod because he's so dang tall, nothing wrong with him and nothing we didn't already know he has to improve.

Paul's trying to quit smoking before Oct. or Nov. because that will make it 10 years and he wants to be over it by then. He tries every year to quit for longer stretches at a time so I hope this year he manages it for good.

Waiting for nurse to call re: spotting. Other than the grocery store yesterday I took it as a semi-bedrest day. Bored, but rested. Call me back already! :P I have an appt. tomorrow so I guess I can ask Sari if the OB nurse doesn't call yet. Feel tired but no nausea (thank you bands!). Paul looked at me strange and then laughed at me when I grabbed my head and said "Ooooh.... my brain hurts!" but that's what it felt like. My whole body feels like it's all out of order.

OMG -- this huge wave of fatigue just hit me. Where did that come from? My whole body feels tired, my eyes feel tired, just all ugh. Is this a sugar crash? WTF?

Dad called to see how I am feeling and asked about my exercise and I said I was off bedrest but no plans for exercise today. He then put Mom on the phone. Mom informed me that she's been looking things up in the chinese almanac and next year is the year of the monkey. So baby will be like my dad -- another monkey. She wanted to know if I've been peeing a lot (yes) and said that probably means it is a girl. I told her I already looked it up in the chinese gender charts and it looks like a girl there. But then we'll know with a later ultrasound. Paul was thought ot be a girl and look what happened!

Sooo looking forward to dim sum with the family on Sunday. Mmmmm.... lots of nice things to eat. I'm obsessed with good things to eat lately. Also looking forward to a workout soon... I'm getting antsy.

Up early today with some cramps so I ate some goldfish crackers to ward off nausea, elevated my feet and finished reading The Seven Dials Mystery by Agatha Christie . Paul made the observation that the entire area around the twin bed is littered with books. What did he expect after a week of bedrest? No more spotting, so I'm not going to count that slight bit from the other day because I refuse to go in for another whole 7 days of bedrest. I'm not planning on doing anything major today, but still! Enough bed rest already. I feel like an invalid. And bored. If it turns up again I'll worry about it then but for now --- free! A whole day stretching out before me! Hooray!

I just want to clean the kitchen, the fridge, and get groceries for tonight's dinner. That's all. No other goals, no other ambitions. Just get my kitchen into shape again. Then chill the rest of the afternoon -- crochet or watch a movie or something.

In Unfinished Portrait by Mary Westmacott (really Agatha Christie and really her unofficla autobioraphy) Celia is pregnant and throws up everywhere the whole pregnancy. The doctor describes her as a "healthy but suffering animal." I feel a strong kinship to Celia lately. Sigh.

Never ate the pizza for dinner. I had pb&j instead. So I are it for breakfast and it went down well. I've put the bands back on so perhaps that's part of the reason. I'd taken them off for the last 2 days because the seams itch me. Thanks you gals for telling me it will get better. I believe you, I do. (But then what choice do I have? Haha. :) )

Strange taste in my mouth has made tap water, Publix water, and Zephyrhills water unbearable. The only water I like is Dasani water right now. Angie wanted to know if this is the "metallic" taste you are supposed to get in the 7th week or so. All I know if that it makes things taste strange. Milk is def. off my list for a while. Orange juice is iffy -- sometimes it sits and others times it doesn't.

Today is my last day of bedrest and I saw some brown spotting come back when I used the bathroom. Does that I mean I have to rest for another whole 7 days?! I am going to go nuts! Have to call nurse and ask. Poo!

I told Paul to talk to the Peanut and tell it to stop harassing me so. He looked amused and asked if "Just wait til your father gets home!" was going to become my new line. I was too distracted scratching my stomach all over to answer him. Ugh. I itch! Itch! Itch!

Spent most of the day sleeping. Thank goodness for goldfish crackers. I hate saltines but I'll tolerate goldfish because they at least have a slight flavor to them. I want a cold Sprite and pizza so I'm waiting for the sprite to chill and I'm waiting for the crackers to stabalize my stomach so I can see about having a slice or two of an Amy's Pesto Pizza.

It's a miracle that people have more than one kid after dealing with morning sickness the first time. Holly called to tell me about her interview and ask how I was feeling and I told her that if this keeps up at this rate I'm demanding drugs at my next OB appt.

Dreadful day. All I've eaten is a banana and some rice cakes and they stayed down. I tried cereal and threw it up. I ate a bagel and threw it up and had to change my underwear because I threw it up so violently I peed my pants. Too much information, I know.

Part of me takes the light hearted view and tells me this isn't so bad and that it will hopefully go away soon.

Another part of me wants to punch that part of me.

Another part of me wants to eat something delicious only I can't think of what that might be.

Another part of me wants to run screaming from the part of me that dares to think of eating things.

Blah.

So far so good... the accupressure bands seem to be helping. But the real test comes tomorrow morning because that's always my worst time with morning sickness.

Now I'm hungry and I want cinnamon cereal, cookies, and chicken. What I have in the fridge? Chicken nuggets (no!) part of some roast chicken (maybe), no cereal of any kind (poo!), and no cookies of any kind(poo!). I did get some Jolly ranchers for the next time that particular mood strikes.

I got two books today from overstock.com --- Exercising Through Your Pregnancy -- by James F. Clapp III and Getting Ready for Baby: The Ultimate Organizer for the Mom-To-Be by Helene Tragos Stelian. I've only looked at the organizer so far and it looks neat. I'll look at the other tonight. I'm counting the days to Wednesday when I'm off bedrest because I am desparate to exercise. Supposed to be good for helping with morning sickness so I'm ready to go.

Mom e-mails to tell me that she was talking to my aunt in Hong Kong and told her the news and that Aunt Annie sends me a big hug and congrats. Then she says that Aunt annie asked her to remind me to be careful when having sex because of the whole spotting deal earlier this week. Mom said she was going to tell me that anyway and to not mind the "old lady impertinence."

I was amused and told her bed rest includes pelvic rest. So no, people, Paul and I aren't living it up lately. But it isn't because I'm not horny as hell. Hooray, pregnancy hormones.

And since I'm talking about sex, and if you are so minded, think about donating to Scarleteen.. Scarleteen is a privately owned, volunteer-run sexuality clearinghouse for teens and young adults that receives no federal, state, or local funding. If it isn't your thing that's fine, but if it is there ya go.

5:30 AM! Ugh! You know when I get the chance to sleep, I've been sleeping really well. But when the nausea kicks in there is no way for me to be comfortable. I've had some Special K, and while it stayed down so far, it's not esp. helping. So much for trying to eat small meals. I've had a tic tac, and while that helped the weird taste in my mouth, nothing. Same with brushing my teeth. Tried peppermint tea but one sip and the strong minty smell put me off. Ginger ale -- I can take it or leave it. So far room temp. lemon iced tea is staying with me but I can't relax enough to go back to sleep.

I think today I'll get sea bands. If I'm still up when it turns light out I'm going to zip to walmart to get some bands. . I keep asking myself why I didn't just get a pair last weekend before this kicked in? I knew it was coming. Poo! :P

Thanks to my readers! I really appreciate the nice notes and baby photos you've been leaving me over comments, guestbook, or e-mail. You gals are so sweet! :)

The endoc. appt was with the nurse prac. and she basically looked me over and then went over my lab results. Now that I'm pregnant they want to monitor my thyroid and insulin more closely because I may need a higher dose of levoxyl and things progress and then there gestational diabetes to worry about. Everything except my insulin stuff was in range and fine. She said I need to try to control the insulin bit with diet and exercise and I explained that I'm on bedrest and I'm also pukey so I'll give it a shot but I know for sure it's not going to be perfect. She was very sympathetic and said when she was pregnant all she wanted first trim. was potato chips and lemonade. (I want sourdough bread toast and ginger ale!)

I have another lab in 8 weeks and I can do it at their office now and not go to the lab nazi's. Hurrah! I also have an appt. with Dr. H. in 10 weeks for a lab result review.

Next Thurs. I think I'm going to do a short walk and see how I feel rather than jumping right back into water aerobics class. Then prehaps the next Tues I can get to class. Today after my parents dropped me off after the appt I just crashed out. So tired.

I'm going to try to get Paul to help me cook over the weekend. I can deal with prep work but I can't deal with the smells from the actual cooking so maybe if I get everything ready til the last few steps he can take over from there. Otherwise it's going to be another week of frozen foods and sandwiches.

I have this intense desire for a Jolly Rancher. And I haven't eaten those since junior high!

Paul is still riding a little cloud of father-to-be joy over that first u/s. He's so cute. :)

6 weeks today. I'm struggling with ravenous hunger one moment and literally the next -- nausea to the point of food avoidance. How am I suppoosed to eat like this? Midwife said if it gets so bad I an't get through a day to call because there are meds for that. I'm going to try to hold out til 6/30 appt. and then go from there. So far I've eaten a banana and then 90 minutes later I threw up. Going to try cereal in a while and see how that sits.

Mostly I feel tired and sleep a LOT. But the bedrest thing is already old and I have to keep going til Wed. Nrrrgh.

Read some tips for bedrest from storknet. Some of it is obvious, some of it was useful.

No spotting this morning. Back from clinic. Very sleepy so short entry. Had sonogram. Few days further than I thought -- 5 weeks, 6 days. Everything fine, told to rest and take things easy until there has been 7 days since my last spotting just to be safe. But since spotting looked like old blood and very scant, most likely nothing.

Paul tickled pink over ultrasound because we got to see a little heartbeat. Was pleasant surprise.

Cramps continue. Very bad yesterday (mon.) morning so I missed my endoc. appt. and called my GP's nurse. Also had some pinkish spotting on toilet paper after going to pee. Eventually she called back and said to go to the ER to be looked at because it was either a possible kidney stone or vaginal bleeding while pregnant. So I called Paul to come get me only he had his car break down! So even though I was not feeling great I had to go fetch him.

We left his car by the road and spent 4 hrs at ER. Not so bad and they found no blood in a urine sample and a pelvic showed a closed cervix and everything in good order. Doc said spotting is not uncommon in first trimester but to go home and rest for a few days and def. call my OB about it tomorrow and see what he wanted to do about it. He told me I wasn't miscarrying at that moment but they still consider any kind of vaginal bleeding during pregnancy a "threatened miscarraige." But then again it could resolve itself and women often can have this happen and carry to term just fine. So we get out of the ER and have to go find a tow truck to get Paul's car. By the time I made it home I was ready to crash out on the sofa. What a day! :P

[Later]

Slept really well -- thank goodness! I needed that! Light spotting on TP when I use thebathroom continues -- it's brownish now. Called OB and I have a 10:50 AM appt. tomorrow for a sonogram and blood test. Wish it was for today but they don't do sonograms today. Nurse said not to worry and so long as it wasn't red blood and I wasn't needing a pad or anything not to stress. Just take it easy today and stay off my feet. And to call if things change.

For the most part I feel ok. Not freaking out, not anxious. I wasn't even freaked out last night at ER. Just super cautious.

• What:Mall walking


• Distance a little over a mile

Today we went to the mall and did the inside loop somewhere between 1-2 times so it was somewhere between 1-2 miles. Took it easy and was also semi-shopping. I had to get mom's birthday gift card at Burdines and I was also looking for maternity clothing just to see where to find it. Let me tell you, for a mall that brags over it's 200+ stores, there were only 3 places to find maternity-wear and it wasn't esp. pretty or encouraging!

The walking was ok -- had some nausea and some cramps though and it made it annoying. Stopped to rest for a bit a few times.

Feeling great today! Such a nice change from yesterday. Just mild cramps. Would you believe I took a nap and never woke up until midnight last night? Had a quick dinner and back to bed. Felt vary fatigued.

Paul has named my pregnancy "Peanut." He's started singing the peanut song too. This morning he said goodbye to me and Peanut both when he left for work. He's giving it a little personality and I'm still a bit detached. I think of the two of us he's the more sentimental/romantic.

This was a very nice website on fetal development with photos. But clicking and hearing a gooshy kind of heartbeat was a little disturbing.

The lab nazi's took their bloody sample (pun intended) and left me with a bruise. Rat bastards. I HATE going over there for lab work to be done. Dr. H. needs new lab people. Big time. Poo. :P

18 DPO. Last night I had a headache again. I was also moody, emotional, on the verge of tears, and had dry heaves. This morning I'm about the same except minus the weird cramp in my thigh. Paul thinks maybe the cramp was from the pool Tues. I don't know that I'm going to class today -- it depends on how I feel this evening.

I called a nurse at my GP's to ask if there is anything at all I can do about the nausea/heaves. If it was just nausea I think I could bear it out but the heaves every few minutes -- it's gross. I put Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream on my hand just to have something nice to sniff when I feel one coming. It seems to help a little bit to get my mind off throwing up. Ugh. Ugh.

I'm getting worried about weight gain -- every morning I'm a pound higher! Surely that can't be right. And I sooooo don't want to go anywhere right but there's that stupid lab to go get done. Maybe I'll go after lunch/speaking to nurse. Maybe I'll cancel it. So indecisive.

17 DPO. Dr. B's (family practice) called up to tell me my other tests are in and I have a UTI. Poo. So I have to take amoxyl to clear it up. I have to get out of my wet bathing suits faster after pool -- This is the 2nd UTI I've had already.

Had some breast ache and cramps last night. I feel very tired this morning and I might just go lay down again. My stomach itches all over too.

[...later...]

Argh. I went to nap and the same nurse calls to tell me that she called my OB and he pregerred a different antibiotic. I said fine. Tried to go back to sleep. Just got cozy when the nurse from the endoc. called to ask if I still wanted the labwork. It's not me who wan'ts labwork. It's the doc who wants labwork. So why doesn't she ask him instead of me? I tell her the same couched in more polite terms. Back to nap. Ring! Ring! Nurse again telling me that Dr. H. said he still wants some tests but not all of the ones he listed prior. Like it makes a difference to me because I still have to go give a blood sample. What do I care if it's 3 things he's checking or 5? It's the same getting stuck with a needle! Tell her to fax it to the lab and I'll go tomorrow. If it is not there I am to call their office and they will fax it over while I am there. Fine. Nap attempt continues. This time I get to sleep for a few hous and then the phone rings again. It's my mom wanting to know how I'm doing and discuss house plans. I told her I was napping and she let me off fairly easy becuase I must have sounded groggy.

All I wanted to do today is to have a nice easy day and not worry and not think abotu anything. Why can't I do that?!

• What: Lap swim
  
• Distance: 0.5 mile
  
• What: Water Aerobics


• Duration: 60 minutes

It was overcast but it didn't rain so class was a go. I got there a bit early -- enough to knock out some laps while waiting. Midway through class though my attention span ran away. I had a hard time concentrating and I could only thing about how fast class would be over so I could go get food. I'm going to have to eat a snack before I go next time. My hands are all tingly like I was wearing latex gloves. I'm allergic to it. But I can't think of what I may have touched today that did it. Unless it was the soap when I washed my hands at the sub place.

I felt decent today. Still some boob aches and minor cramps but no significant nausea or headaches Actually I was pretty spiffy until this evening. Very energetic, upbeat, nothing the matter with me. Then the glass in my nipples started up and cramps came along. I had a headache last night from hormones or a bad pillow. I can't tell what.

So far, found only one practical article about walking during pregnancy. Hmmph. Did find another about workouts though. Expecting FItness has a website -- I thought it was just the book.

Had a disagreement with mom over exercise while pregnant. She thinks I ought to rest and take it easy. I think I ought to be careful not to overdo, but I can take my walks and go to my WA classes if I'm not struggling with nausea or feeling gross. So no, I'm not planning on marathoning, but jeez. What's wrong with being active?Pregnancy is not a disease! Then she started in on my meds. I've already had them all changed and even dropped some. Then on about prenatal vitamins. I know she's just anxious, and wants me to have a nice, healthy, safe pregnancy. I just have to figure out a way to include her without it making me batty.

Nurse just called with lab results and congratulated me and told me it was positive. I was perplexed and said thanks but I knew that already. The beta was to better gauge how far along I was. She sounded perplexed and said she had not been given the results, just that it was +. I asked her what I should do and she said she needed to fax all this stuff to my OB. I said I'd been waiting to hear how far I was so I could schedule the OB because 1st visit is 6-8 weeks or thereabouts. Round and round. The end of the story is that I called up the OB, told them I want an appt., that I can have my family practice fax my stuff, and if they want my guess I'm 4 weeks. They can figure it out from there. Yeesh.

Home from weekend. We went to visit and to give my MIL a break. Babysitting Mawmaw wasn't too big a deal and really, Paul did a lot of it alone today. I was so zonked I just wanted to sleep. At 8:30 AM he ame in and begged me to do something about breakfast and to make Mawmaw take her meds and if I did that much he'd leave me alone the rest of the day. I asked him why he couldn't make breakfast and get her to take her meds and he looked panicked. I gave up, did what he asked, threw up, and went back to sleep. I think he felt bad about that part but it can't be helped. I've hit this "weird things make me gag and if I gag I throw up" phase. The smell of eggs and sausage did me in. I didn't eat any of it.

I told Mawmaw I was pregnant and she got all excited and speechless. Sit down, stand up, sit down, stand up, pat my head, sit down, clap, quiver, cry, stand up. Not really sure if it stuck in her mind, but at least she got a kick out of the news. Paul told me later having a conversation with her was def. more challenging and he can tell her Alzeimer's is worse. I agree -- but that's not anything that can be helped. You just go with the flow.

I was wondering if stopping the Glucophage was going to send me into frenzied eating, but so far it hasn't.